that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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