The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Randomize