Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
