would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
FUCK WHALES
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
