He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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