i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Randomize
