ya dads aren't the best wingmen
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
she peed on how many people?
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
