Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
