What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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