Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
