girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
