He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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