I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
