he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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