Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
