You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
So many bounce houses so little time
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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