dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
