butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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