dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
