I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
