no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
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