i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
