hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
