So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
