seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
