Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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