If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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