And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
