so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Randomize
