cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
So much rum. So many feels.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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