Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
