He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
