i permit you to call me
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize