Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
