That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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