I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
