I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
