So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
we're making bets on your personal life
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
