Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
