You just made me feel so damn special
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
