yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
