Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
