Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
