yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize