I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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