you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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