As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize