I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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