Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
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