Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
should my penis look like a turkey
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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