$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
